am i supposed to cry for you?
that evil grin, your ice cold skin.
you've got me hooked on you.
how long has it been since i broke in?

your cut wrists are tied to the wall,
no fear, other than when you realized you've lost all hope.
and i smile at the sight.
no one cares if you scream at night.
your pretty grin has faded over time.
where's your battle cry?

tick tock, tick tock.
look at the clock.
reverse.
what does it say?
666, baby I'm on my way.
sorry if i'm moving too slowly for your taste.
and if you need something to help you,
feel higher than the sun,
i suggest myself.
i promise it might help.

shoot!

knock it's head clean off.
why is the television so ******* loud?
no, i can't hear a ******* sound!
the dysthymia won't turn it off!
cut it out!
i beg you.
i wish all my demons would listen to me.
fastidious.
signs of symptoms.
they all go back to you, even if you don't want them to.

your diligent ways to make me suffer.
you don't quit until i am no longer continuing to breathe.
spending all my days, reticent, hesitant.
the world would be better without me.
that's it diary.
entry, number seventeen.