Today should have made a year and a half
Should have. . . but it didn't.
Instead of celebrating a day I'd looked forward to
for months, I tried to forget it.
But failed.
The funny thing about failure is this:
I usually don't know what i'm doing,
That's why I fail.
But not this time.
Maybe I don't know what I'm doing,
but I failed because I didn't want to forget it
I don't want to forget you.

Weeks have gone by, but I can still feel your arms around me.
You still haunt my dreams; I wonder
If there will ever come a day
When you don't.

I think about our lass kiss, back in early December.
The way you looked at me,
with so much love in your eyes,
and how you leaned in to steal one last kiss
before your parents stole you away from me.

You always had to steal kisses from me.

As we kissed our last kiss,
I felt you smile, and I smiled too.
I took a step back, just to be wrapped up in you
once again.
Little did I know that
was the last time you'd hold me like that.

I wish I could live in that moment.

I wrote you a letter, my love,
and was going to send it with your clothes,  
but I don't know if i can.
I asked my mother to mail your things back
the day after Christmas,
but they still sit on a chair in her room,
taunting me.

Sometimes, I wake up in the middle of the night
Sobbing,
Frantically searching for your hoodie
(I always used to sleep with it).
It is only when I cannot find it
that I am able to comprehend the fact
That you are no longer mine.

You will never again be mine.