Perhaps I was too much of a coward,
to not be able to express my feelings
to you, whom I loved.

Perhaps if I had more courage,
I wouldn’t be where I am today,
watching you from the sidelines,
always hoping, wishing,
yet never being fulfilled.

Perhaps if you didn’t notice me,
then I wouldn’t have had false hopes,
to continue dreaming,
knowing it would never happen in reality.

Perhaps if I had never seen you
in the first place,
I wouldn’t have fallen so hard,
but it’s too late for that.

Perhaps,
I wouldn’t have liked you from the start,
if you had never existed in my life,
but why must you?

Why must you make me fawn over you,
treating every interaction with you as a treasure?

Why must you make me so head over heels,
just because your smile lights up my life?

Why must you make me,
make me unable to get over you?

Why must you make me such a mess in front of you,
blushing and unable to say a word?

Why, perhaps if I wasn’t such a coward,
I wouldn’t be here writing this.