If only I knew
That kiss would’ve been our last. I would have kissed a little deeper

If only I knew
that hug in the cold night was our last. I would have hugged a little tighter.

If only I knew
that was the last time I told you “I love you”. I would have said it a bit softer.

If only I knew
that was the last time I’d look into your eyes and see love staring back. I would have gazed a little longer.

Abruptly, all this was taken away by you.

Your conflicting thoughts described to me a day later.

While people carried on with their lives around us as if though they couldn’t hear my heart shattering next to you.

I’m helpless in this moment. Unable to comprehend why this is happening.

You tell me I should be hating you, well love, I’ve spent seven months loving you and no amount of pain can fade that.

So I sit next to you, unable to touch your hands which I craved so desperately.

New tears travel down the path paved by old dried up ones.

My mouth is clamped shut unable to tell you what my brain wants to say.

Your brain was conflicted. You tell me there’s no one like me but for some reason, that doesn’t seem to be enough.

We used to be in tune with each other. How could I not see this coming?

Those thoughts scratching away at me inside your head.

Until those thoughts clawed at our love until there was nothing.

Now I feel nothing.

Like an empty space waiting to be filled once more by you.

But you’ve made up your mind for us both. No consulting like we once did.

Our last moments feel like a lie.

Your mind flipped in an instant.

Forcing mine to try and piece everything together.

But you were the pieces that made me whole.