i say i strive to do my best but that is not true i strive for perfection because my best isn’t good enough anymore
if i’m in the 99th percentile there’s still 1% who beat me i must be better
A’s are not sufficient anymore i have to have 100s in my classes i must be better
i am a hideous Medusa of a monster i must dress better, cover my face i must be better
if i am not perfect, i am worthless if i am not perfect, i am worthless if i am not perfect, i am worthless if i am not perfect, i am worthless i am worthless i am worthless
i deserve this endless hunt, this punishment always failing to meet my goals i deserve all the sleepless nights and anxiety and having panic attacks over getting a B on an assignment Why? because i am a worthless human being i only hurt and cause pain and everyone who has ever known me knows this, even if not consciously they are all perfect in all their imperfections, balancing it out with kindness and friendship i am just worthless