THE FIRST TIME


sometimes the sky's too blue
The stars are too bright
sometimes the very air we breathe is intoxicating.
I know this…. I know this.
She was just 18
I was only seventeen.
I was far too young
To be a safe place
But passion roared like a lion.
I was its slave.
She took me after the prom.
I swore I would die loving her.
That was not a lie.
But life is a ghost
A specter that returns to haunt you.
She told me she was pregnant.
I was overwhelmed’
I was frightened.
She left me
I went with her to the clinic.
I sat outside in the beat up Chevy.
She moved to LA far away from the tiny
town I lived in.

About fifteen years later
I saw her again
She came back for a class reunion
She saw me I was drinking a glass of wine
My heart stopped I felt a flashback.
She was angry at me I know
But I asked her to dance with me.
She finally accepted
And the ice melted
There is no one
who can take the place of the first --no one

She called me a *******
I agreed with her.
She said she hated me
I said I understand why.
She kissed me
And I kissed her back.


A year later
We walked into the fall park
Its beautiful foliage glowing in the evening sun
The twins were laughing in their stroller
I picked them up
And said
I love you guys so much
I will be here forever for you.
And she opened a door in the heart that  
She had saved just for me
And i walked inside.
I heard her close the door behind me
Locking me inside
She threw away the key
Into the urban jungle.
And I was safe here
Knowing I had found a place
That I would live forever
And I knew
That there is nothing
That can replace
The first time