I didn't cry
As we said goodbye toss and turn
and gently weep
Should I fail to fall right off to sleep
Or endeavor to sever any sense of remourse rising up... along
the course of my day should I see
the extra key
now hung on the hook, or a stray ...
paperback book
as I put up ...that...now
extra coffee cup  
or anything else
that seems out of place designed
to leave the trace
of a tear down my face nor have I felt any sense of dread concerning that
half empty bed
Consciously choosing to fall asleep
on the couch
or recliner instead
nor have I felt any nostalgic bite
when rolling over
in the chill of the night finding no one there
to cling to
I do not choke up
when I read or hear the same phrases
or words
used elsewhere
That was said
between ....us
as we broke up  
no driving miles
out of my way
or checking my emails  over and over each day no practice calls creating phrases looking for
the right words  
not one of these things has brought any tears any pain
but I'm crying now ...as I'm realizing how unfair it is to see
by what I just shared how little I must have cared....
...... that truly makes me sad!