I ache. I hurt in my heart and my mind
and in my body all over. I lay in bed for
hours at a time and sometimes moving
feels like the most daunting thing.
I exercise some days but I’m not sure
if I’m trying to keep my body healthy
or if I’m attempting to punish myself.
I’ll collapse on the floor, muscles ablaze
with the effort of lifting my spirits-
but I think my hands hurt the most because
they keep writing to someone who isn’t here.