So I just did some math. This week, according to the numbers, I've consumed on average 375 calories a day. Call it 500. I have no appetite; I'm stressed; It's hot; I'm ill. This relapse is not like the ones I know. It's so subconscious I'm drowning trying to fix it. I tremble as I write this. I don't know how I get through the day. But I do know, there is a mountain of responsibilities that I must manage regardless. I can't just over medicate and play games when I'm stressed. I can't rest when I'm sick. I must bare it all, for both of us. I'm being crushed by this mountain.