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Jun 2018
In the room across the hall,
You see me, I’m all alone
Behind deadbolts and locked doors,
I built them on my own

You knock and knock, my ears are closed
To everything outside,
I’m smothered under voices,
And all they let me do is hide

“No one’s knocking,” I’m convinced
The door is closed and locked.
And to all the affirmations
My head is being blocked

The walls keep getting smaller,
I’ve barred myself inside
Chained down by doubt, by every word,
“I love you” is a lie.

I can’t hear you over all the buzz,
Just tell it all to stop.
I want the truth, never said I could take it
I’m bracing for the drop

I’m locked inside this room,
And I’m just about ready to snap,
And you don’t know to let me out
Because you don’t know that I’m trapped!

I’m trying to believe it.
Someday I’ll ask you for the key.
Just know that I, I’m sorry.
For the nightmare that is me.
Sawyer
Written by
Sawyer  21/Genderqueer
(21/Genderqueer)   
274
 
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