I didn't choose you at twelve
I was broken but pretended you made me whole
In a way you did, yes
But it was not enouugh, my fears got the best of me
not knowing it was you it took
I didn't choose you at thirteen
I was self centered
I had made myself believe I deserved someone more spontaneous, unboring to make me feel alive
But I didn't know it was constant I needed to make me feel safe
I didn't choose you at fourteen
I wanted someone new, I was busy with friends
I said you would only keep me down
But you were the one who's always kept me on my feet
I didn't choose you at fifteen
I was scared
You had enough of me now,
But you still made me feel important
You kept your distance when we were sixteen
You liked someone else
Suddenly the world was yours
And nothing was mine

At twenty one we saw each other
for the very first time
I witnessed someone I loved for 10 years walk away
And I still didn't choose you
But I knew now,
At twelve I loved you because you were my friend who drove away my fears
At thirteen I loved you because you made me feel the center of your universe
At fourteen I loved you because you were the constant thing keeping me alive
At fifteen I loved you because you respected me enough to stop pursuing me
At sixteen I loved you because you were still my friend even after all
At twenty one I loved you, I love you still, I love you always
But I didn't choose you now
Because now
you're not choosing me

(M.E.G)