you look at your life,
and all that you see,
is brokenness
and hopelessness
as if there's nothing
standing in your place.
you look at death,
and death looks back at you.

that moment when
they tell you
that you're
cheap and disposable
like the piece of trash
that you are

how many times have
you heard that before?

they throw punches
like they throw words
little do they know
words are like scars
they leave marks
on your life
like no other

it's like no one knows
no one feels
the pain
the suffering
the weakness

they call you
a coward
they call you
weak
they laugh at you
and belittle you
they push you down
and kick you
and like all
the other beatings before,
you take it.

they tell you
I'm sorry
but they don't mean it
they only say it
because they have to.

they tell you that they'll
be there for you
be by your side
every step of the way
but they're wrong
they lied to your face
just to make themselves
feel better
only to tell you that
they're busy
you don't feel better,
heck, you just feel
alone.

they say that
they know what
you're going through
they say it's going to
get better
but it --
--
--
--
doesn't.

they ask if you're okay
but they don't mean it
they don't give a ****
about how you feel
you want them to ask
if you're happy...  

but deep down,
your mind is shredded
your body is beaten to bits
and you feel like ****.
you want to slit your wrists
hold a gun to your head
and count to three...

One.
Two.
You don't even make it
to three.
You pulled the trigger
and your mind goes
blank.
You face death
and death stares back.