There are days, weeks,
Months even, when
I'm perfectly fine.
When words roll off my tongue  
Like raindrops off an umbrella
When my smile lights
Up my own small world.
And then there are  
Days when life itself is a  
Nightmare.  
When The Bell Jar drops upon  
My room,
When my brain turns into fog  
And my body like salt on a rainy day
Dissolving into the very air it breathes.  
Feeling better seems like the  
Hardest thing I'll ever do.
But, The worst part is  
That I don't even want to feel better
I want to keep dissolving, keep reducing
Until there's nothing left to be dissolved.  

This thought is what frightens me most.