I don't know why I keep crying

What is wrong with me?!

Why can't I keep my emotions stable?

Why is this happening to ME

Why!?

Why can't I just be normal

For once in my miserable life

I have a great girl

I have amazing friends

Supportive parents

Understanding siblings

So why me

Why does this still happen to me

After all these years of not feeling okay

Why can't it just go away

Why can't I just stop crying

I love everyone in my life

I'm not so sure that I love life anymore

Or even myself.

I cry myself to sleep a lot

Almost every night

I'll cry myself to sleep tonight

I can see it now,

Head in my pillow to muffle the sobs so my sister won't hear me

I won't tell you that I'm crying

I don't want you to worry

I can't have you worry about me anymore than you already do

Which is a lot

So I'll just cry by myself

Without anyone knowing

All alone

Like I'm meant to be