The night I gave up
I didn't frown
I didn't cry
Not a tear fell on my cheek
I spoke with ease.
I bent the bars of my prison
And I escaped
I walked the streets and shared my love
Barefooted, dressed in my imperfections
I wore my flaws on my sleeves
My heart in my throat
I held my dreams in the palms of my hands
For any stranger to follow
Like pieces of myself, I gave them away
So that I might not be forgotten
So that I might continue to live
Even when I'm not breathing
Even when my lungs are drenched in river water
And I march to the other side
To the slowing beat of my heart
I walked until my toes felt the cement curve
Then, I knew it was the end.
My eyes turned black
Black as the night
My soul dark as the mascara on my ******* eyes
My heart like stone
Fallen
And scattered.
The soles of my feet burned
From the coals I'd stepped on
Walking through hell
Bringing a little back with me
Scorching the grass beneath me.
I shredded cities and they stared at the monstrosity that was left inside me.

I looked back at all that I had left behind
And down at all that I had left
I smiled
Because every piece I had given away
Was glowing.
I was angry, but I was free
My purpose was finished
Maybe not completely
But it was all my fragile soul could take
So I turned back towards the water
And I
Jumped.