coming to consciousness is a must yet its painful to retain all these words sordid shards of nothingness i am learned for i know that i've learned nothing except what i’ve earned by remembering plenty of ways to fake a riot keep quiet or dry it in the sun sheltered on the run blasts from guns to gynecologists solecisms and syllogisms miasmas of the mind time unwinds in butterfly defenses semblances of the freedom we traded resemblances to our mothers and our grandfathers in helmets filled with money left to rot in the sun’s basement the used ones who wait for their retirement plans to conclude their lives with guttural fluctuations effluent and stagnant waters, frenetic daughters portraits of amazement the lazy masters sadly agree to replace them sweaty fixtures grasped our hands and minds sign language kept silent stretched out in striated alignments cut me some slack for there can be no turning back from this place she gave everything away save the furniture which wasn’t hers anyway once it takes a hold of you it doesn’t like to let go of you grab the fire by its nose and release the hose if you wish to control the soul water pouring from our bones i bow down to your ground we are going home arguing no more our moist hearts becoming clearer, nearer i am breathing louder in my own theater and in my own studio i am making music that makes the flowers bloom