I finally understand how much I hate myself

I'm sorry for clinging too tight to the people I love,
I'm sorry for the addiction ruining friendships,
I'm sorry for the people who I hurt inadvertently,
I'm sorry for having my heart continually bleed
I'm sorry my friends can never stay a part of my life,
I'm sorry my mind is a stew of PTSD and abandonment,
I'm sorry my body has felt the blade to ease the pain,
I'm sorry my heart is so shattered I can't love past friends,
I'm sorry I ever trusted certain people not to hurt me,
I'm sorry I've always been alone and don't understand people,
I'm sorry I always talked straight because I hate ******* games,
I'm sorry I either try too hard or give up too easy,
I'm sorry that hope has taken it's leave from me,
I'm sorry that my faith became critically wounded,
I'm sorry that I was a let-down since I was a child,
I'm sorry that family never really felt like family,

I'm sorry for the hurt, the misery, the agony, the pain,
I'm sorry for the things *i can't change...