the aching loneliness that rises up into my throat, scratched raw with fire, and settles into my fragile rib cage as the most unwanted guest, has been there for as long as i can remember. my anxious, angst ridden youth has done little to put my soul at rest. perhaps it shall never rest.

i've never felt that i belong anywhere, for my soul grows tires if i remain in the same place for too long. i don't know if i'll ever find a place that i truly belong, but i hope i find it soon because the life i've been living is draining. so much so that i'd like to run away.

i am like the ocean, fickle and tumultuous, glimmering and dangerous. i can take you to strange place with exotic women and tropical delights, make you believe in every sight, every fata morgana, like it's the truth, and i can make you hurt. i can be cruel and unforgiving, showing no mercy for those who dare cross me. i can be a hurricane and sweep you up in a storm of unbridled passion and fiery rage. i can make you drown.

my dear, i am the lover you wish you had, the lover you wish you knew. i am the lover that would die for you.

i'll wait up for you on my throne in room thirteen, honey. i'll wait for you to come along and take a walk on the wild side for once; you'd like to think you're bad, nut i know in your heart you're soft. my soul won't wait long, so hurry up, boy, before time runs out.

don't you want to find heaven, honey?