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Jan 2017
If I were asleep right now, you'd be all I dream
I'd feel your warmth through the covers, so it seems
But right now, as you sit in the passenger seat
Of my parked car, I can't help but feel deceit
Emanate from your gaze, your smile, your laugh
How can you look me in the eye and say, "It's all in the past?"
True, I know you're not perfect, but nobody is
And I've no intention of being a perfect kid
But listen to me when I tell you that my love for you is hopeless
Hopelessly enduring, endeavoring, embracing
Whatever painful realizations I might be facing
Whatever derailment I'll have to follow through
Whatever ******* mistake I may or may not do
I just wanted you to know you are my hopeless everything
Even as you close the passenger door behind you
And tune out my words with some Broken Social Scene
As you throw a stone through my car window
And as the glass pierces my elbow
As you elude me in a fit of tears
That I know I've brought out of you, my dear
As I drive away in silence
Consoling myself through musical compliance
Now, as I lie here in bed, I can't help but crave you
I combat your warmth with the rush of a drug
My second white girl, my first being you
And as I stare at the ceiling, I see the glow-in-the-dark stars
That you and I placed, calling the ceiling light Mars
I find that I miss you, darling, I miss you so much
But how can you miss something that you could never touch?
A someone who never really loved you much
A someone who exists only in dreams
Well, I don't know...I'm frightened it seems
To wake up from this and return to my loneliness

This is my life, I guess....
Josiah Manzanares
Written by
Josiah Manzanares  California
(California)   
353
 
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