Of course I am angry

I tried my best not to love you

I tried my best to focus on your many flaws

I tried my best not to continuously see past them

I tried my best not to allow the carefully placed ice around my heart to melt

I knew better, I knew better a million times

Than to fall for someone who was always at war with himself

And yet I did

Yet I stupidly, stupidly did

Whatever pain I've felt, I accepted the very moment that I became used to wondering and worrying about you

The very moment I felt my mouth curve up instead of down at your irksome comments

When I began to detest your absence instead of presence

I could not focus on your flaws

I could not stop looking past them

And when I saw that my layers of icy indifference were turning into a puddle

I stood over it, horrified.

But my reflection only smiled back at me.