I don’t think you ever really see me do you?
I exist much like the air inhaled, I'm well within your orbit but you don’t really see me do you?
I seem to exist solely for your benefit, to replenish your cells and get your blood circulating
And while I give you life, my status within your realms is akin to a manner of precipitation…
I noticed the clouds gather, I offered shelter because you matter
The curse I’m blessed with, one of secondary placement for the greater good and benefit of others
To empathise with the seemingly unforgiveable at the cost of my own bothers
Pathetic I know, but it was assumed the minor sacrifices would be worth it because you were
Pathetic because even as you termed me such I still loitered, I stayed near…
Pathetic because even as you eroded any notions of self-worth, mines was a heart plagued by fear
Could I ever, would I ever be good enough
Why was mines a pursuit so rough
Surely there is everything wrong with I, it has to be I mean why else?
Is it that perhaps he gives better *****; he erodes your ***** like no one else
That why I can never measure up? That why our time is up?
Perhaps it’s within his touch, he leave the kind of bruises I’m not capable of
He tell you where to ******* like I’m not capable of?
Could I get better, can I be better and yet selfishly you still manage to reign me back in
Not enough that you leave detonated my most vulnerable bits, that you have me conflicted as sin
But I have to try for cordial now when I should rightly will you off a buildings edge
Within I, you left dormant, yet strokes of a mountainous rage
I bid you please; I beg you kindly, dare it not to erupt
I want it not to erupt because all that is good with me, all that I feel I am, I don’t want it to corrupt
We said goodbye and let it be that, I might care that you breathe but it bothers me not how much
We’ve been allocated dedicated lanes, rather we stick to such
If you ever cared at all then afford me sanity and let me be
I cannot risk you ruining me
I’m bitter, angry and disappointed. Not so much with you but with me.
I let you be you at the cost of me
I saw the true reflection when I was the one battling remorse.
The crimes were yours, the burden mine
I gave myself to you. I now wish I hadn’t but I gave myself to you.
I still have your taste in my mouth, still aroused at the slightest thought of your touch…
I pray it goes but it stays with me and that makes me want to hate you more
It reminds me again just how pathetic I can be.
We said goodbye and let it be so, when you explicitly said that we can never be so,
We’ve said goodbye and let it be so.