Reverting back to my teenaged years
I pressed a razor into my thigh

I liked the way the blood
Mixed with the raspberry & vanilla
Suds in the bathtub
To make this ombré
Of maroon fading
To peach

My brain's been itchy
For weeks

I am overwhelmed
And imaginaing
The bathtub
With no bottom

Drowning
In a ceramic hole
That leads nowhere

My body
Wrapped
In
Raspberry
And Vanilla
Soap suds,
And my hair
Wet
And long
Between my
Shoulder blades

I wanna be
As pretty
As the ocean,

A perfect shade
Of baby blue,
With navy
And purple
Accents
In the deepest
Spaces

And I wanna be
Just as infinite
As the ocean,
Incomprehensible
To the modern
Human mind,

Everlasting
& Impossible

Went to take a bath

In a room with no windows

Disappeared
Without a trace

And no one will ever know
The bottom is an illusion

There is so much more
Beneath,
To dive in
Or die in

my mind
UNRAVELS
and lands here
At the brink
Of reality
And delusion

And I stay here
Because it's easy

And it's kinda silly

And no one is angry,

Not even me

But eventually

The water
Runs cold
And I start to feel
My
Heart beat
In my finger tips

And as I take the trip
Back to my body
I dread the dizziness
I know is waiting
On the other side

Cause I cut too deep
And now I have to
Explain myself
In the back of
An ambulance

And,
And,
And,
"Morgan,
Aren't you too
******* old for this?"

Oh,
How I'm homesick
Homesick
Inside of myself