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Sep 2016
What a sick game
A game of chess I can't seem to win
I'm a pawn
Being moved back and forth
But no matter where I go
It's a checkmate

I'm so close to the edge
I'm looking into the pit of depression
I know he's down there
He's always down there

Here I stand
On the edge
Even with the knowledge of his destruction

What a bittersweet mentality
Things are so sweet and peaceful
Then it suddenly tastes bitter in my mouth

My words turn into cement
Closing my throat
And suffocating me

So close to the edge
I can see over the pit
I can see the other side
But I'm afraid to jump
I'm afraid to go for it
Because of this bittersweet mentality

I'd get there
To the other side
And I'd be happy
But then I'd fall
Fall into the deepest, darkest pits of depression

So I stay on this side
Trying to find away across
Pacing back and forth
Like a pawn on a chess board
Trying to solve an endless puzzle

I feel like I'm about to fall
But I'm fighting
I feel like I'm going to lose
But I know I'm going to win

I won't let this bittersweet mentality
Rule my life anymore
I'll get through this
By myself
Or with the help of those around me

I will get through this

No thanks to my bittersweet mentality
Written by
Phoenix  23/Agender/United States
(23/Agender/United States)   
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