how do you explain the hollowness you feel within?
how do you tell people that you feel empty, like someone scooped everything out of your soul
how do you fake a smile and talk real loud so that you drown out the demons within
whispering, taunting, urging oh go on, it's only too easy to...
how do you say you're fine while hoping, praying someone will look into your eyes and say 'No, you're not.'
how do you cry yourself to sleep every night and go to school with a pre-planned smile, yes I'm fine just really tired, math tutorials make me want to **** myself
and they smile knowingly because they understand
but if only they knew just how true that statement is.
if only they knew how you stared out of the window, knowing that there is nothing that could possibly hold you back from leaping over the edge and soaring, spiraling down to your reprieve from this hell, this flesh prison to which you are bound.
if only they knew how many times you held that bottle of pills in your hand, knowing that if you counted out 27 pills and downed them all at once, your oh so tired heart would slowly slow down and eventually stop, sending you into a peaceful slumber .

if only they knew that some people were born to die,
and that's okay.