i swear
it was the longest night
of my life
and i've had a lot of long nights

i'm trying to forget
i'm trying to
i'm trying to
i'm try
i'm try
i'm
i'm
i'm

choking
suffocating
under favorite
blankets
and blanketing
thoughts

blank
mind goes
blank
free of everything
but panic
and wondering
where
my next
breath is
coming from

the last time
this blanket helped
but the last time
wasn't this bad

the walls i've stared at
for so long
have never looked
this way before

i'm trying to forget
trying to forget
i'm trying
trying
i'm
i'm
i'm
i'm

gasping
for air
but too tired
to bother

you held my hand
and promised
it would stop
i don't know
if it would have
if you hadn't said so

and when the storm
ended
you asked if i wanted
to talk about it

and i did
i swear
i wanted to
but i just couldn't
make the words
happen

i'd take you up
on that offer
the next time i happen
to be able to form a
coherent thought
outside of a poem

(which means
i'll probably
never
get around to it)

and you said not to
think about it too much
i believe you
i know you know
what you're
talking about

so i'm trying to forget
trying to
so i'm
forget
forget
forget
trying
trying
i'm try
i'm

remembering
every single
**** reason why
but all i want
is for it to
all go away.