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Jul 2016
I wish I could talk the way I write...
I wish I knew how to tell you what's on my mind...
I wish I could...

Because I would tell you that I'm scared shitless to lose you, that I can't help but to selfishly want you for myself at times.Β Β 
I would tell you that my heart wants to jump out of its chest every time you say you love me, and that I feel butterflies all over my body when we kiss... I would tell you that I wanna hold on to every single moment spent with you and save it like a treasure in an old wooden chest. I would tell you that fighting with you makes my heart ache deeply and that your pains, I feelΒ Β them too. I would tell you that my heart is in your hands and that I'm scared like hell that you might let it fall and break in pieces... that I don't even want to think of that happening with you...
I would tell you that this distance we're about to experience frightens me... and that my eyes fill with tears when I know it's soon coming. I would tell you that I try to be strong in front of you, but that my soul screams inside as my heart cries in silence... I would tell you that you have all of me, even if you didn't want it; that I love to sleep on your chest because that sound of your beating heart soothes my constant anxiety... I would tell you that I love to wake up before you in the morning and give you one thousand kisses as you awake when breakfast is ready... I would tell you that knowing you won't be around every night makes my heart cry... that my loneliness scares me.... I would tell you that I don't mean to push away ... this is just me coping with it... the distance scares me... I don't want to hurt... I don't want you to hurt... I just wanna tell you that I love you... I'm deeply, uncontrollably, passionately in love with you.
Marcia Villavicencio
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