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May 2016
When you left, you took pieces of me I didn't even know I had.  The day you left, I thought my world had ended.  I don't use that as an exaggeration either, although I wish I could.  I remember not being okay for quite some time.  I remember not wanting to get out of bed and I remember hating waking up, knowing it was another day spent praying to reach your voicemail, since I knew you answering the phone was not an option.  I remember falling asleep the same way.  I remember seeing you everywhere even when you were 100 miles away.  Your touch still lingers on my skin and it's always seeping into my veins. I cry you out just for you to be absorbed again.  Your words are embedded into my head and they're stuck like a record player on repeat.  Your smell has stained all of my clothes and even my ******* sheets.  I toss and turn all night and I get whiffs of you every ******* time I do.  Our memories are constantly spilling out everywhere we go....they leak through the walls and drown the floor.  I cried throughout the days I saw my mother whisper, "you're killing yourself" and although the pain never stopped throughout that time, I wouldn't take it back.  Now, my eyes have widened.  I have known love and I have known loss.
allison
Written by
allison
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