As you throw me against the wall and risk giving me a concussion
all I can think is how much I love you
As you kick me and spit in my face
all I can feel is the ache in my heart
As you slap me repeatedly and pull at my hair
I don’t need to hold back, because I know I won’t fight back

As you hold me in your arms
all I can see is the love you have for me
As you look at me with rounded loving eyes
I close my own and forget all the pain you put me through
As you brush away the hair over my eyes
all I feel is your warm fingers on my cheek

Why do I do this?
Why do I love you this much?
Why do I pretend that you never really mean to hurt me?
How do I convince myself that you do these things out of love?
How do I manage to ignore every single blow that lands on my body?
The stabs in my chest?
When will I find my voice?
When will I see that I don’t deserve this kind of pain?
When will I let go of this addiction I have to you?!

But I know.
I know why, how and when.
Because I need you. Because I can’t be without you…
…and I will never let go.