Questions to the Darkness
by jay-bryant
** *
Twenty-four hours in a day,
Though these nights feel longer as I lay.
Like an orange I wish I could peel off my face.
I count each breath, while my heart begins to race.
Coffee and lectures get me through the darkness.
This ride of emotions got me looking car sick.
Knots tied in my throat. This Boy Scout’s lethargic.
Steady sipping cough syrup to numb the harshness.
Combing through empty bags for crumbs,
Long periods of sobriety make me feel like a lunatic.
It’s crazy how you can feel homesick for years.
A bum at heart, my home is flooded with tears.
I’ve seen the light I always feel my death is near.
Headlights glaring and I’m stuck staring like a deer.
Dear world,
Will you miss me?
Will the Grimm Reaper kiss me?
Shrouded in darkness could this be the abyss I see?
On my knees praying it’s the sun I see.
On my knees praying I see a son whose just like me.
Dear Darkness,
Will you ever leave?
Am I walking through this life blind,
Because of you or because of me?
Will I see the light before my son sees me?
Is this pain that ails me hereditary?
Is it necessary?
Dear God,
Will you ever bless me?
Cease to test me?
Am I Job?
Will ailments continue to infect me?
If scientist dissect me will they find out why my heartbeats?
Dear Son,
You are my future heartbeat.
I will walk in darkness if it helps you see light.
It’s not all about strength in the psychical.
You can’t always see might.
It’s the fire in the dog that controls its fight.
I have no questions for you.
I only question If I’m doing right. * **