You fix in me what is broken
What was stolen by those I trusted
What was lost at the ******'s hand
A hand that was his ****
A pain so carefully hidden and nurtured that I thought the pain was me.
You let me use your eyes and then I could finally see.
I wasn't to blame. I wasn't insane.
It wasn't a bad dream or a fantasy gone astray.
It was ****. That's the totality of what was done.
No softer word, no kinder thought.
They ***** me. For a time I thought it was my fault.
I drifted. Lost without a tether.
Through the darkest space and deepest valleys.
Sometimes I would chance upon a stream and see my reflection.
The boy who caused it, who deserved it, who must have liked it.
Otherwise why would they have done it? Again and again
And again and again and again again again again.
No fun to read, but try having lived it.
Sometimes I would find someone to cling to.
But I couldn't explain and they couldn't understand
Because I didn't understand. So they left.
And alone I would wonder, untethered.
My soul hiding, curled in a ball. Afraid of everyone
Especially those I loved. The ones who ***** me
The ones who didn't stop it.
Broken. Broken as a child. Broken as a boy.
Broken as a man. So broken I couldn't be a man.
Locked in pain. Locked in fear. With my broken pieces.
But you.
You fix what is broken inside me.