the voices around you grow to a roar
a crescendo of celebration and excitement
the heat from everyone surrounds you
a blanket of sweat and musk
the fireworks in the sky keep exploding
a breathtaking show of glittery brilliance
the weight in your heart sits
a sisyphus boulder that never seems to go away


*you're standing amidst the countdown crowd right at the city centre with all these overjoyed and possibly drunk people, the cheers erupt with each fresh firework blossoming yet in this humid climate all you feel is the wind blowing, the chilling pinpricks of a light drizzle. you remember how you love fireworks- their spark and the heart-in-mouth explosions and it all turns to dust in you because you can't find any joy in them now. lately it seems like all you have is dust.