I keep trying to hold my head high
and forget about you. Forget about
the past. Forget about
everything. But I can’t forget,

and I can’t forgive. All I have left are these
memories of you. I don’t think
I’m doing it right. I don’t think
I’m supposed to smoke this much

or drink this much but it gets me high
and that’s where I want to be
right now. In a way, I guess
I am keeping my head held high.

With drugs. I could float
away in a sea
of cheap bubbly.
I could fly through the sky

with every inhale taking me
further into the exosphere.
My hands are searching for
someone else’s to hold but for now

this bottle will do. My lips are searching for
someone to kiss but for now
this cigarette will do. I keep trying to hold
my head high and forget

about you but all I can do is
remember you in the morning.