the big fat bus,
with the big fat yellow bootay
was racing along
the country,
shore to shore,
sea to shining sea,
gulping in every sight.

as she flew through the west,
she caught sight
of a handsome young brave
sitting not far off the
side of the
road,
sharpening the blade of
one mother,
of one huge mother,
of a huge mother ******' knife.

and she thought she caught sight of
another huge shiny blade.

silhouetted against the backdrop
the light blue cotton sheets
gently swaying in the warm wind
on this sunny day,
filling them with fresh sweet
scent of fresh
sun dried air.

he intently focused
on the blade,
holding it up to the sky and
slowly,
very slowly,
drawing his thumb over
the edge
over and over,
'gettin' there'
'gettin' there'
he must be thinkin'
she was a thinkin'.

speeding along,
she glanced quick right,
and thanked the good lord
she was born without a head.

nor any tufts of fine locks on
her big fat yellow bootay.

for she had no hankering’
to be gittin’ no scalpin’.

better leave those up
to those oh so annoying
two-legged humans.

note to self,
she did make,
one to herself,
that if ever she passed this way
agin’.
she would give this
fellow one wide berth.
as he’s a lookin’
like a fellow
she didn’t want,
with to be,
messin'.

YET...
thought she.....

meanwhile, way over yonder
the manly cowboy
felt a chill grow,
shivers crept up his spine,
just as he felt a cool breeze
caress his scalp.

'hmmm that brave lad
can’t still be a ponderin’
if’n he’s awantin’ to be scalpin’ me?
he can’t!
can he?'

'nah!'
thought the manly cowboy,
pulling his wide-brimmed hat
ever so firmly down on his head.