These words that stay trapped inside my head
As I gnaw at my tongue
Preventing the painfully true "I think I love you" from escaping.
My fears of rejection causing palpations of my heart
Rippling through my veins
Tearing at my lungs
Until I wish to force a knife through my throat.
My thoughts walk through my mind with a killing smile
Sensing discordant anxiety roaring through my chest
Until I am a quivering shadow of emptiness.
What is my purpose in this god forsaken, cruel world?
Within my head, thoughts of suicide echo off the once joyful now turned to black memoires
Of the times I could truly smile.
It's not that I want to die
Its just that my depression eats at my body
Destroying me from the inaide
Until now I can no longer take it and suicide...
Yes! Dreaded suicide has become my only other option
As I no longer can see myself living this intoxicated lidfe
Which drains the heart and soul out of me.
For you see I am a mere human who has lost herself to the bitterness
And your sympathy and words of "its not your fault" make me believe otherwise.
I'm already dead!
Trapped in a shadowy figure of a girl you all think you know.
Beaten down until the point of unbearable decision and pain.
Suicide is my only option.
Its not that I wanted to die, but I can no longer live!