Blurry,
Numb,
Painful.

Those are the words that I use to describe the night I was in a car accident.
A young mother on her way home from the bar crossed the center median and hit my best friend.
She lived but suffered mentally afterwards.
The accident ruined the friendship and I was called an ADDICT.

I was forgotten.
My bills were paid and I failed in school but I was forgotten.
No one returned my calls.
No one asked how I was.
I was told that I needed to get out to get better but no one understood the physical pain I was in.

A bruised and fragile body. Still able to move but in very small increments.
Recurring nightmares and flashbacks nearly every hour but still smiling.

I was told to **** it up and get outside to hang out. I wanted to **** myself. If I was so much of an addict or a baby, I should have just swallowed the pills right there.

Fresh from my 18th birthday. I wanted the accident to happen all over again.