I didn't even cry
all I felt was numb,
desperate to push it off my mind,
desperate to forget.

You.

Drowned in regret,
I tried to push it away,
all the things,
all the things,
I didn't do,
all the things I didn't say I tried to wash away in a bottle.

I can't pretend at all and I can't help but wonder even after all this time...

If you're still on my mind, am I still on yours?

Was I ever on your mind or was it an illusion I created, a bomb shelter, just a fantasy.

If there was something there could it be there still? I guess I'm just hoping there is a good reason I can't just close the door and walk away.

What more I can say? I was in love with you in every single way but too young,
too foolish,
too scared,
to open up my world to you.

Unable to feel truly anything for anyone except when I push myself in a trap,
Trying to think of anyone and anything else possible,
but my mind always wonders back to you.

I guess I'm still in love with you and there's nothing I can do.

The truth is you weren't even mine, I just fooled myself.

I was blind.

I guess I just need you back in my life.

But its too late now.

The bridge was ripped apart by a banshee in the night with no tears to cry.

I didn't even cry,
all I felt was numb,
drowned in regret,
I just need some closure...

And if you wanted to talk,
I'd be willing to try.

And start over new,
a new me,
a new you,
a new us?

I just hope you're doing okay and you're happy in love and in life in general. I'm sorry for wasting your time. I'd understand if you hated me, I feel like you should hate me now.

..........a part of me will always love you <3 ............