"My favorite thing about her would have to be her personality:

Mean, snide, lazy, insincere,
manipulative, controlling, cowardly,
condescending, territorial, insecure,
entitled, selfish, superficial, capricious,
disrespectful, brash, immature,
foolish, arrogant, pretentious,
rude, holier-than-thou, insipid,
and even a little bit childish.

What's not to grovel and worship?
Truly, I cannot think of even one shortcoming."