I find myself
Laying awake at night
Staring blankly at my ceiling
Wondering what went wrong

I find myself
Drinking so much
That I can't feel my face
Let alone this suffocating pain

I find myself
Craving cigarettes
And my friend Mary Jane
And smoking myself to sleep

I find myself
Thinking about you
Remembering your embrace
Finding this too hard to face

I find myself
Regretting my decisions
Every single choice I've made
And hating every breath I take