the words in my mouth
feel like a sinking ship.
“I love you”
is a treasure chest
at the bottom of an ocean
and I am not fond of the idea
of drowning.

there was something surreal
about the way he looked in the moonlight:
he was stained with shadows
and painted with smoke clouds
and his arm around my waist felt like an anchor.
every breath that ghosted my neck
was coated in warmth
and our hands found each other in the darkness
with perfect ease.
there was something surreal
about the way he looked at me:
like I was meant to be his.

I’m getting better
it’s almost easy to brush aside the trivial things in life
when the world turns so quickly around you
when time is no longer something that is given freely
and the days are counted by the tasks that need to be done
I like being busy
because then I can’t think about myself

trapped in the greyscale world of the night
where there is no color and there is no light
where heavy, tired thoughts will thrive
and bittersweet memories come alive

I’ve waited all my life to find
that someone who could stand my pride
my stubbornness, my independent ways
that aren’t exactly patient

I found you

in the driver’s seat of a beat-up jeep
and down the pier with both bare feet
your smile was enough to turn
my fondness into something worse

I knew you

you could take my hand and hold me tight
and I‘d walk with you through the night
no words were needed to describe
the way I felt by your side

I loved you

I am made of untapped potential and stubborn resolve:
an inferno rages underneath my skin and the ocean courses through my veins.
I hold an unlit match in one hand
and a water hose in the other.
I could set it all on fire;
make it all come crashing down.
or, I could drown the rest of the earth.
perhaps I'm the one to start the flame,
and the one to put it out,
but the world doesn't know that yet.

I dreamt of you in technicolor
a vivid sunset of fleeting touches and flashes of smiles
I walked through hope
and didn’t stop to wonder why everything was so bright
and nothing felt real
but it didn’t take long for the color to fade