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Jay Jan 2015
I so desperately
miss the feeling
of words
spilling onto
empty pages.



Maybe it's time I came back.
A little something for myself
Jay Jan 2015
The way the light hit her face from across the small amount of distance between us was almost heavenly.
Not because of the way the light reflected off of her, but because of what her face reflected-
absolute beauty.
It radiated off of her and made me wish that although we could see each others faces,
the distance between us was not divided by two screens.
It made me feel as though this room was a prison
and the picture that I saw was my window to daylight.
Her face makes me fall more in love with the world.
And every starry night I see,
every flower I smell,
and every summer breeze I feel
can never compare to her.
Jay Oct 2014
Although it seems ancient now,
and although it may mean nothing to you,
with the changing season,
and the cold settling in,
I am reminded heavily
of you
and the time that
we never spent together
and how my porch remains as empty
as it ever was,
even though it sure felt like
it was all reality.
I hope life is treating you well.
Even if I'm nothing; you often cross my mind.
Jay Sep 2014
Maybe if I wasn't me, you'd be infinitely more happy.
I can be better.
Jay Sep 2014
Maybe I really didn't know what I was looking for.
Jay Sep 2014
Everyday I have to swallow my heart
back down to where it belongs.
When it feels so broken,
and it seems like it's trying to
escape your body,
and it feels like it just wants out
to get away from the pain,
only for a moment-
I pour the biggest glass of water I can,
hands shaking,
and force my bleeding heart back down inside myself,
as the cold rushes past my lips and
down my throat,
I finish it hastily,
gasping for air,
wishing that I would just drown instead.
Jay Sep 2014
And in it all I lost myself, feeling extraordinarily useless.
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