I mentally pace back and forth tracing and tracking my train of thought and somewhere along these ragged,ratchet lines I get lost
My past right behind me has had it claws waged into my soul and regrets make their way to my tongue and come out as my apologies of unerasable black ballpoint markers that have mummified my previous lovers.
I have stopped corpsing but these cadavers wont get it
I sat there with my bent vertebra making sense of these calcified skeletons that have made a home in my remodeled closet right after being thrown out.An Elijah to them.
Our love being crucified by them.
But I hope that love is like Jesus or that somewhere in his genetics love is Jesus because if he is, with three days of darkness a resurrection is long over due. His eye filled with uncertainty.Regret wipes his smile away in a heart beat. His kisses turn bitter still hoping that love is Jesus or is the son of Jesus or a cousin even because then the hope that his kisses will be kisses again.
This is not religious at all....
Its about my past that haunt me and the fear of losing him
I just had an epiphany
a collective angry symphony of poetry
My words want to escape and spiral into existence
Grow feet and wings
and be the comfort of my mother
words teach my brothers
I want you words be as a forgotten zygote
shouting with my CAPITALS
and hyphenate their sorrows and thanksgiving
words be as incense
soaring to the ends of the world
bow down in front of the creator
My words and I are messengers
Yesterday he was in me and the stars bowed as I touched the sky
maybe its not his rib I got but his pelvis
I'm in between laughter and crying.. some bare thin line
His hands are drawing contours on my skin
we all give in especially ,my *******,they surrender to him
my thighs are praying to him now
right after I wrap myself in him and fall into death for just a brief moment
like the surf biting the shore,
again and again,
and the woman opens her mouth with pleasure
and her teeth gleam
like the alphabet,
Logos appears milking a star,
and the man
inside of woman
ties a knot
so that they will
never again be separate
and the woman
climbs into a flower
and swallows its stem
and Logos appears
and unleashes their rivers.
with their double hunger,
have tried to reach through
the curtain of God
and briefly they have,
in His perversity
unties the knot.
Persecution your honour
I breathe guilt
I bred lies
My suicidal innocent where are you?
Why have you left me hanging?
Truth why have I neglected your malicious teachings?
Have I none left?
Every staggering lie truer than the next
Inert emotions turned me into a female canine i confess
I am your Delilah Samson
Cutting off your strength strand by strand
Deceitful intent with every touch
Every kiss an Anaphylactic shock it may seem
Pray you say
Pray I said for I am the grim reaper herself
Dressed as an angel of life: A daemon I am
Wear that Armour Goliath
Because as tiny as David maybe he is still capable of turning you into a corpse
Hail oh hail, my sorrowful woes
Drift away from this shipwreck
I, a hypocrite the knight of terror...
Forgive me Lord for I have sin
The sin of lies rocks me on its back, sleepless horror, rescue him Lord
Truth, truth, truth ,truth repetition decays meaning
Floods of sorry cannot erode the stone shape hurt I have imposed upon your child
Toss and turn, toss and turn in Noah’s flood...ark left you broken down
Repent I shall....
Trembling earthquake, forgive myself?
My discerning limbic...
Be mindful, my feelings are a catalyst in this reaction...unchanged
Proven by my cryogenic heart
THE CRYOGENIC HEART WHICH TREMBLES IN THIS ARID CLIMATE
WHERE THE HEAT OF CARING DEFIES CRYOTHERAPY
A CLIMATE OF SORROWFULNESS, DECEIT WHY???
UNFORTUNATELY THERE IS NO THERAPY
BECAUSE THE IDES ARE COME
SOON TO BE GONE MAYBE
HOWEVER YET TO BE UNDERSTOOD
In this piece i have betrayed the one I love and I admit it.The last stanza is a message from my beloved.....