You gave me the excuse
that the world doesn't
revolve around me when
I asked you why you got so
distant, but baby..
You're my whole world &
I love you more than a
penguin loves it's
true soul mate.

As time passes by I
realize I need you more
than the moon needs
the sun to shine.

Don't allow yourself to feel "dumb" or "stupid" based on your inability to achieve something you care little about.

-Joseph B Schneider

To be or disappear?
All I see around me is people
with frowns on their face
& no joy in the world.
Is this how it's going to be?
I'm not an adult yet &
all I have ever known
is to deal with all the sadness in
the world.
I don't know.
What do I do?
Isn't the point of life
living prosperous & happily
surrounded by the people I love?
Working hard to achieve success.
But what does all that come
down to?
You live your life, whether you're
happy or sad, judged by the entire
world. Trying to do better everyday
for your own good.
But at the end of all that we all
come to an end.
Oblivion.
It won't matter what we did
with our lives.
It won't matter if we were rich
or poor.
It won't matter what kind of
clothes we wore...
So why am I still fighting this battle?
Can you please let me go?
I don't want to live anymore.
To be or to disappear?
I know the cost of life, it's pain.
Not being entirely happy.
But what is the gain?
So I ask again.
Why am I fighting this battle with life?
With destiny.
With the future.
Why am I still making the effort?
Please let me be happy...
But my happiness involves not being here.

I warned you.
I told you.
I informed you.
I repeatedly told you
again & again.
You should of see this coming.
This has happened before.
I'm surprised it took this look
to happen again.
Now I've lost people once more.
But it doesn't hurt.
I have become immune to this feeling.
I never mean to do the things I do
that hurt you.
I don't expect you to forgive me.
This is the way I am.
I don't try to be this way.
I am a compulsive liar.
I make up things that aren't real.
I don't care after I've hurt people.
I don't worry about others.
I don't love my "loved" ones.
I am a reckless teenager.
The most cliche of phrases.
How cliche that I use cliches.
I don't want to be alive but I don't want to die.
What to do with my life?
Take it, make the best of it?
My thoughts don't even make sense anymore.
I guess I'll just go with the flow.

The fact that the world
goes round & round,
doesn't mean it revolves
around you.

The fact that you
love her, doesn't
mean you can control
all she does.

The fact that she's
your daughter,
doesn't mean that
you can decide
what she's going to
do for the rest of her life.

The fact that I loved you, doesn't mean that I'm going to let myself
think about you everyday & want you back.
The fact that I needed you & you weren't there, does give me the
power to complain, because you said you would always be there.
The fact that I care more about others than myself, doesn't mean
that you can step over me & take advantage.
The fact that I am writing this about you, doesn't mean that I still love you. It means I am strong enough to let go & realize that I deserve better than you.