Inside: loneliness and pain
Outside: pitter patter rain

There are times when I'm reading
I sense in the silence
The Nothing, the Absence
Never to meet again

World of pain. World of illusion.
World of violence. World of confusion.

Still two green lights outside
Still remember Malahide
Still love the Princess Bride.
I tried, Father. I tried.

awake in the night
cold coyote calls
All Walls Fall

The isolation is quite frightening
But it isn't entirely true

My roommates are still here
Family on Facebook too

I am both alone and not
My loved ones in my heart

I write a few little poems
Suffering produces art.

This need to fight in me
Not sure where it comes from

My father was in the Air Force
They sent him to Vietnam

I do not like that war
But my dad learned to fly planes

I know mystic flight
And I know secret flames

And I heard Thich Nhat Hanh
I call him by his true names

11:11 a.m.
And I am still in bed

Hopes and fears and silences
Runnin' round my head

I eat and sleep and worry
Wait for the phone to ring

The hope comes from the scientists
With that vaccine thing

Human, only human
Ding **** ding **** ding.

Said J.R.R. Tolkien

The Tao Te Ching advises quiescence, and wu wei, taking no action that is contrary to nature.  It also exalts the humble and lowly with the compelling image of water that always moves to the lowest place, and yet can wear away stone.

                      - Understanding Taoism
                     Jennifer Oldstone-Moore

1:11
Marguerite Porete
Not quite yet ...

         Eckhart.

1:11 a.m.
Yes, I am wake

Peacefully the crickets
Irish rebel songs

Gonna attack the priest
Lady of the Lake

Mr. Charles Darwin
Mr. Harry Wong

1:11 a.m.
Up late, quiet alone

Sent the letter
Will I have to phone?

Mysteries come
As hints and guesses

Childhood
Still can blesses

The Nos contain
Hidden Yeses.

Pythagoras said, All is number
I wonder what he meant?

37.37
On sneakers that I spent

Yes, the mystic madness
At times appeals to me

All those 37s
On license plates I see

They say apophenia
I do not fight back

Just walk my lonesome way
Plan my next attack

U2 on my stereo
Leonard late in London

No job just now
My father is my fundin'

But I keep applying
Something will break through

C'mon now, Mr. Biden
Workin' hard for you

             Pythagaroo!

sleeping late, frightening dreams
        would you really want things
                to be not quite what they seem?

I agree:   more is less; less is more.

                But for whose troubled team?

Both innocent and guilty
Both pure and a bit corrupt

Do you eat the bread?
Will you drink the offered cup?

Dinosaurs once roamed the Earth
Now we have the cars

Some scientists think water
Is to be found on Mars

Is chaos too a mystery
In this Chaos of ours?

The nightmare of our history
The glory story stars.

Mist in Budapest
White owl, Grey sky

   When will I die?

So I studied philosophy
And religion
And theology
And myth

Many people
Many modern people
Would regard this
As a colossal waste of time

They might be right.
I am now 53
Unemployed
On disability
Living alone

The Bangkok temples at night are quiet
The traffic outside is loud
But inside
The Buddha sits.
Silencio.

A different kind of man
That's what the General's father says
In Embers.
Chopin, not a soldier

He's actually her ex-boyfriend
The Joker
But if he lets her go
It would hurt her
Not help

Lunch time: miso soup with kelp.

Empty hotel room
    In my solitude
              112

Often life is just too hard for me
The chaos and the pain

But my love for my wondrous 3
And oh! the Purple Rain

Now you see, Now you see
The Trumpists are insane

I lie awake, 11:23
Keep them safe again.

The darkness has come again
As it always does

Maybe postmodernity
Maybe just because

I lay in bed and lonely
Don't read much anymore

American despair
Waves crash on the shore

      Dread. Like before.

The memories linger
Stockholm sun

Misty Dublin
She's the One!

I'm lonely and tired
Miss them dearly

How much time?
Tick tock yearly.


        Christmas!

No birds singing now
Darkness, electric light

We all drift towards death
Things won't work out right

Wind in the trees
Philosophy don't know

Kindness, if you please
Nitnoy Reno snow

              Yo. Yo. Yo!

99 percent
Such is my cell phone

99 percent
I feel quite alone

I keep sleeping through the days
Wandering through the nights

Markson on my left
Tolkien on my right

Prayers for my young sons
They are my true delight

Prayers for dealing doctors
Don't give up the fight!

Gotta love those medieval philosophers
Alchemy, winding streets
Cistercians, Inquisitions
Fire to the feet

Sometimes I stare at fire
Carolina Inn
She's the object of my desire
Where would we begin?

America is the Swirl
Highwater Everywhere
Tom Joad not the Pearl
County Fair! County Fair!

The Irish church in ruins
Will I get to Istanbul?
Late night pub in Boston
The wearing of the wool

                 1137

We sit in the restaurant
Me and my youngest son

A priest one table away
Conversation has begun

Rolling Stones on the radio
The sound is rockin' true

Bill comes to $11:37
I know it's just coincidence
(but I like it, like it - Yes I do!)

wokeup late
a little light

thinking less
no mind of fright

Hunan vegetable
Buddha's delight

childhood
Mr. Spock kite

  well alright!

basketball again into the night
         silent walk home
           black brothers

11:37
I think of Leonard Cohen

Late along in London
Wonderfully knowin'

He himself was broken
The music's beauty showin'

I yearn to be a sailor
Wherever the wind is blowin'

                Starry sky above
             Ain't no cure for love.

11:37
Kamala Harris
India meets Jamaica

  in San Francisco

11:37
11:38

time tick tocks
born too late?

or maybe destiny
not foot Fate

my past, my muse
my angry mate

all alone now
seperate

a time for love
a time for hate

silent God
world creates.

11:37
The night is dark and quiet

I've taken some real risks
More? I'm gonna try it.

Don't know what will happen
Intuition leads

Memories and missions
Meekly mustard seeds

                  Reads.

11:37
About to text Mark
Thinking of Mr. Keillor
And the beautiful brown woman
From Malaysia
I spoke with tonight at the basketball court

Coconut curry. Dragonfuit. Durien.
Slow and steady for me please. Not hurryin'.

I have problems with the fear
I want to sleep and sleep

Loved ones not quite near
Eternal silence deep

Very little money
For me alive to keep

But Pharoah's army drownded
O Mary, don't ya weep.

51 years
A million fears

3 beautiful sons
My darling ones

Diabetes, high cholesterol
Gout, anxiety, bipolar

               Endurance!

the terrors of the Night
                 silence amidst the violence
                                   waiting

11:37 p.m.
Pink Floyd to Mark

My friend dear
Wish you were here!

11:37
One for Johnny Cash

Folsom Prison Blues
Boy Named Sue to make them laugh

You and Westley
Both the Man in Black

You are gone from us now
But your music will come back!

Extinction forever.

Like we were never even born.

Einstein and Shakespeare
Sittin' havin' a beer
Einstein tryin' to figure out
The number that adds up to bliss
Shakespeare says, Man, it all starts with a kiss

Einstein is scratchin'
Somethin' on his napkin
Shakespeare says,
Man, it's just 1 and 1 makes 3
That's why it's poetry

    - Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band
                   "Frankie Fell in Love"

All the sadness sits and hits
She's not here, kiss my grits
Grey day blues, gentle rain
Facebook Tooks, Purple plains

               Forever Fame?

Struggle with my self
Sometimes better. Sometimes worse.
Sleep again till 3
Dylan's 7 curse

Had to try the writing
Sacramento. Un Escritor
Lonely as the rain
Inner Harbor, Baltimore

Train to Chartres Cathedral
Train to Nowhere too
Know when to hold 'em
Reno Rendezvous

                 Midnight Blue!

Painful, lonely, meaningless
Welcome. Join the club.

Vegetarian tacos
But sometimes a tuna sub

My oldest son 15
Almost as big as me

If I had to drown
I'd choose the Baltic Sea

Life could be a dream
Lucky number three

Man near the Book of Kells
He said: meant to be.

              Andrew Greeley

long illness
sleeping late
  wanhope

Woke up from a dream
Minutes before midnight

Walking, hands holding Wendy
Susan dressed all in white

           My God what a sight!

Twilight sky goes blueyellowwhite
          Calyx and I to the library
                              math

Tired, near despair
Loneliness unbroken

Tonight nowhere to fight
Oracles unspoken

Darkness comes again
Darkness perhaps eternal

Light comes from darkness
Darkness is maternal

                   Amen.

Tonight I smile at my loneliness
And the absurdity of my life
Alone at 52
Dailiness despair

I do love music
And basketball
And that Irish nurse
For my son she truly cared

                We die.
              I'm aware.

Awake in the night
       Raindrops
         no cops

Grateful for the basketball
Eye on yon Taiwan
12:02 a.m.
About to fall asleep

Stranger than a dream
I like Cornel West
Crickets chirp in summer
Kierkegaard does leap

          Faith steep.