we drank and
she said i
smelled
like cigarettes
I never rubbed
her feet
but i knew
they were cold,
she was high
in heels
she left
and i
felt the
breeze
paint the
walls when
the door
slammed
i watched
her walk
to the street
her hair
was like
stripped ribbon
it was late
and i was tired
and i woke
to a nasty
message
on the machine
but made
breakfast like
any other day

i wonder
how many sets of lips
i must kiss
until i can no longer judge if
it's just for fun
self hatred the pain from which we run
the insecurities we scour like birds circling

If the morning comes
before I wake
I hope the sun
kisses me softly.
You are so bright,
my eyes can hardly take it
but your warmth
is a comfort to me.
I keep safe beneath
these blankets
filling the emptiness
with thoughts of you
How close you are
but still how far
it seems you tend to be.
All around me,
I feel the breeze
from my opened window
brushing the hair away
from my face.
The touch of your glow
against my cheek
helps all the more too
let me greet
the day
but if you come before
I awake
Promise me
that you'll be
the first sight I will see
when my eyes open.