Sometimes
my only          comfort
is a mind

emptied






of it's thoughts.

This love may swallow me whole
but baby you best believe
I would risk being ******
if it meant being able to hold you forever.

I wish I could engrave every moment I spend with you
into every part of me

I want to leave our mark upon the world and
if we ever were to cease

I'd shake my fist at the sky and shout

"We were here!"
"Do you hear me!"
"We were here!"

Would you believe me
if I said that you're my Eternity?

He looks at you as if
you were an art piece.
Beautiful,
appreciated,
unique.
I wish you could see yourself
like that too.

Even though we may one day
burn out in one big blast of light
I hope those who come after
will see our love from millions of miles away
as vast, bright, and infinite.

You know you're falling when you look at them
and think "I'm finally home."

For the first time in a while,
I was able to look at myself
and think, I love you.

You're the kind of person I
want to lay on the grass with.
See shapes in the clouds and
feel the gentle breeze with.

You're the kind of person I want
to go on late night drives with.
Have the windows down and
listen to blaring music with.

Doing whatever, whenever.
Always and forever.

I have traveled far and wide,
and yet I still don't feel
Like
        I
          Belong.

People just don't understand that
when you read our stories,
you're reading a part of us that was
brave enough to escape our hearts.

When I think of you, I see a future
You're my forever.

Scarlet sun dancing on the horizon,
Amber leaves fluttering to the ground,
Golden rays shining through windows,
Lime carpets of grass, wet with morning dew,
Aqua skies hovering ever so high,
Violet flowers waving in the wind.

You laughed at the absurdity of my story, but there was something in that sound that felt like the beginning of something.

Won't you stay for awhile?

You say you'd never be able to do it
But I believe with every star in the sky
You are more than you know.

They say that sometimes
holding on hurts more
than letting go.

I let you go
in hopes of my heart
becoming as okay
as yours when I'm
not with you.

It feels like my
shoulders are lighter
my smile is brighter
and I'm finally whole
again.

"Do you think in some other universe we never met?"

"No."

"No?"

"I think I've always known you."

"In every universe?"

"I have never been so sure of something before."

The best things in life are often
the things hidden behind
disbelief
and
fear.

Even the smallest moments make us happy.

I don't know where I'm headed
I don't know what the future has in store
But today I danced in my kitchen
And sang while walking down the sidewalk
And I have a sneaking suspicion
That everything will be okay

I wish I could tell you how I feel,
but all I can do is stare at this blinking cursor
and think the words instead.

Every now and then
I find myself back in your arms

We're laying on your bed
and there's a video playing on the tv

Every now and then I am yours again
if only for a moment

But you are not here anymore
we will not share any more of those moments

Every now and then I miss them
I miss you

Everyday I
break a little more,
and
fall a little harder.

But it all just teaches me how to
stand a little taller,
and
rise a little stronger.

I told myself
I'd forget
every moment
every laugh
that I shared
with you.

But as I
lay awake
at 3am
I find it hard
to let go of
my best
memories.

Every time I look into your eyes,
I see a future I could stare at
forever

Every now and then
I become 10 years old

I'm laying in my parents bed
melting into worn sheets and heavy blankets

I can hear my sister on the phone
she's chatting about some math test

The walls were always thin

I can hear my mother with the vacuum
and my father and brother cooking breakfast

They are toasting english muffins
and scrambling eggs

The bacon is sizzling
and the hash browns are crispy

I can smell it now as it floods my house
seeping into the hallway and into the room

The birds outside are singing
and the sunlight is golden as it carresses
my weary, aged eyes

But I am 10 right now
my shoulders have no weight to carry

And I feel as though I am one with the wind
slowly floating away from where I should be,
back towards home.

Sometimes I find
that my hands are too small

they cannot hold the world
the way the moon holds the tide.

Sometimes I find
my legs are too short

they cannot decide where to go
the way roots decide to reach and live.

And while I feel these things
lend themselves so my downfall,
I am proud that sometimes

I find my heart is too big

a beating in my ribs
that echos above all sense of reason.

And

sometimes I wonder if that beat
is enough to tell the world
I was here.

You can ask anyone who knows me
I have never been the best at remembering things
I leave my thoughts scattered across the coffee table in my head
But when it comes to you my dear
You are just too important to forget

To be honest I was gonna try to write a sappy love poem but all I could come up with was:

I am very happy you're here with me.

I knew I loved you
when the first thought
I had when I saw you
was that I was finally
home.

I think I'm finally starting to
love myself a bit more,
laugh a bit more,
smile a bit more,
enjoy life a bit more,
and
am thankful to be alive
a bit more.

Each day I find
a new reason
to love myself.

I can finally chase after my own dreams
without you plaguing me with doubt.

It has rained for the past few days. The clouds have hung low and water darkened my world. The cold seeped through my coats and the wind constantly attacked.

But today I saw the sun. The ground is drying up and the water is fading. The cold doesn't hurt as much and the wind is much softer.

As much as I love the rain, I feel like this is a new beginning for me. One where I get to see the light everyday. One where I am thankful to be alive.

I used to feel dead.
like everything I did
was mechanic and
routinely.  

With no feeling in my body or my mind or my soul.

When I first met you
was the first time
I was made aware
that my heart was beating.

That it was possible for me to feel alive.

A piece of me will always belong to you,
There will always be space
for your favorite restaurant orders,
I'll see you every time it rains.

I no longer have to search and search for good things
each day, I can finally find them in myself.

I have never been good
at being someone people would choose
in a crowded room.

I am the smell of rain
and the ticking of a clock.

I am a slight breeze
and a fleeting glance through a window.

I have never been good
at sticking around
long enough to know I am worth
being stuck with.

If I'm the one who taught you how to love,
does that mean
I'm the one who taught you how to fall out of it, too?

I sit here
with a blank sheet of paper,
ready to tattoo it with the words of my heart.

It becomes very hard to make decisions
when everything and everyone tells me
its not right.
But my heart just wont give up.

I hope my hands can one day hold
a empty heart and fill it with love.

To me, you feel like watching a sunset
and bathing in its warmth.

It's like the entire world feels right
whenever I see you.

I find myself holding on
to things that didn't
put in the effort
to hold on to me.

There are so many people in my life who care about me.
People who would take bullets for me.
Fight for me.
People who will always be there.

So why do I feel so alone?

It's like there's a wall
between all who try to help me
and my broken self.
And each time they get closer
my wall gets thicker.

Will I ever be okay?