You start off happy
Giddy
Fun
Then, you're silly
Laughing
Dumb
Next, your brain starts to fly
Rattles
Numbs
You want to go higher?
Sure, why not
It can't hurt to have some fun
One pill, three pills, five pills, nine
Now, you've lost control of your mind
You don't make descisions
Just go with the flow
Jump from person to person
Everyone's wasted; it's not like he'll know
But, pictures are taken
Posts are blowning up
Yet, this feeling is intoxicating
You can't get enough
Before you realize
A week has passed
Your running on empty
And skipped every class
Everyone is worried
But, you've lost the right way
Now, you're addicted to the feeling
Because you wanted to be free for just a day

The candle flickering out in the dark room
It's like falling down into an abyss
Flailing as you reach for the rope you cannot grasp
Trying to call out to the voices you hear weeping for you
Yet, your screams are silent.
Whilst my cries are loud
My tears cannot fall from these hollow eyes
Because death has grasped your hand
And has chosen to hold it tight
I cannot find the strength to carry on without you
Please do not leave
Now, my world is slowly crumbling
The last of this heart is ash
Yet, death doesn't care for my pitiful pain
As long as your beautiful soul is claimed

In this world.
In my brain.
To the rules of this game.
I'm lost as to why I'm lost because I've been shown the way.
This road is in front of me.
Clear as a crystal.
A crystal that's been coloured, cracked, and thrown away.
But, a crystal all the same.
So, why do I want to take that left turn and not go straight?
Travel through tunnels and under bridges, rather than along the empty fields where I can see?
Because, being lost outside, started with being lost in me.
I'm a puzzle.
A ten thousand count puzzle.
Overwhelming and intimidating.
Exotic and different.
A challenge.
I create a plan to find my way.
A plan to not lose myself in all the pieces.
Finish the outer layer.
Work on the next.
Look! I'm lost again.
I work until my body is tired.
My eyes rimmed red.
Until I look like the walking dead.
I'll make my way home, only to be met with turns again.
Let me take a moment to find a way in this brain.
And when I think I've finally found my way,
I'll sleep and wake.
Only to be lost again, the very next day.

An action. Never-ending.  
It's the way I love because I love the wrong way.
I lust for items, I lust for touch.
Most of all, I lust for us to be chest to chest.
With ragged breathing, sweaty palms.
Wet lips and all thought gone.
No gentle whispers.
No soft clutch.
To be held tight. To be kissed rough.
I do not lust for hand holding or that over used, three worded phrase.
The only three words I lust for are 'I want you'.
The only whisper be our skin brushing together.
Nails raking down your back.
A sigh of ecstasy at a long-awaited ******.
And when my body hungers for more,
Lust will call you back to my door.

Love is such an over-rated, over-used word.
But, somehow, I'm in love with you.
With your eyes so seafoam green and your hair so sandy brown.
Your lips so plump and pink; your concentrated frown.
How you love my fingers through your hair and my nails down your back.
It's okay, I love it too, and I'll never take it back.
I love the way you tower over me and carry me when I'm in pain.
Text me good morning, text me good night, and never take me in vain.
How your smile is my smile and your tears fall with mine.
It's just too bad that loving you has turned out to be a crime.
A crime of passion, a crime of lust.
All coated over with a layer of rust.
Because no relationship ever works in me.
So I guess I can only love you casually.

Sprawled across the maroon waters
Your hair tumbles like the sea foam green waves on the shore
Your chest rises slightly as my head lies on your heart
Boom! Boom! Boom!  It flutters like the wings of a hummingbird that joyfully zooms to and fro
What of the small smile on your face?
So bright yet timid that the buds of a spring flower envy you
My arms encircle your slight frame
They slide into place like a puzzle piece
A sign from the courts you are truly for me

Splash! A tear falls into the puddle of others that have fallen
I can feel your heart beat, so broken
Do you feel the beat of mine that broke for you?
I know you don’t hear it
Sense it
Feel it
I stand with you in the storm
It reflects the pain inside of me as you cry over another
Always second in your life, but always here
The pain will fade
Another will come
You’ll smile and tell me you’re in love
I’ll return your smile while inside I cry until you break again and I blow up
But, here I stay
For, I cannot find the strength to run away

Here we lay
Limbs entangled like that of a tree
Our fingers laced tighter than my DC’s
Your pink lips the envy of a newly opened rose hover gracefully over mine
Your eyes that are bright as a star lead to your soul
Did you know they turn from green to grey in the winter?
You may not like it, but they are gorgeous
Two lonely weeks from the anniversary of the day we met
Here we stay in each other’s arms
After a long, dark-filled wait
All it took was a simple phrase
A smile spreads across my face
And we seal our dreams with a soft kiss as our hands lace