I speak in rhymes
But my love is divine.
And if you don't mind
Let's go beyond the lines.
Forget about the dimes.
My love will make you shine.

I find myself spiraling
Into a pit of anxiety
Every time my control
Is snatched away
Every time someone else
Takes charge
And says
'Leave it to me'
My heart pumps faster
My chest feels tight
My leg starts to shake
And I can't trust people
To do the right thing
One part of my mind
Believes they mean well
And will help me
But the other part
The irrational part
Will lead me elsewhere
Down a path of despair
And anxiety
Coming up with scenarios
That would never happen
In a million years
But anything seems possible
When you have no control

The urge to
write a new piece
it comes up
like the feeling you get
right before you're about
to throw up
in the back seat
of a bad idea

but it's not all bad
you always feel better after
well, right after
anyways

then you sip some water
close your eyes
say never again

but that's the whole
fun of it,
after all

I’d **** to fall asleep
these ever sinking eyelids
break the black, the darkness parts.
Behind slits of light
reddening eyes weep
sitting moist, unnerving endings:
shards of vision ignite
swirling thoughts, impulsive pulses
of rapid electric sparks.
Sharpened spiralled contemplation:
daggers, knives of stimulation
emulating scythe like sweeps;
cutting spirals in the throat
I cough and splutter, mutter, choke.
What madness and envy lay
in the thrusting of hours passed.
She wouldn't let me fall away,
slump to slumbers thrown, alas
such beauty to demise,
roll down the blinds on rising skies.
Our crimson sheets grow ever-green;
her sunken body, lifeless, bare.
I imagine her final unbroken dream;
she finds this wealth, too hard to share.

A fool, a fool I am.
How is sharing my stupid life supposed to help me?
It is only a temporary fix, only a scam.
This pain is stuck with me, it is a guaranty.

Made from the flames of my past.
It has evolved to the point that going to the root is no use.
Intertwined with my soul I realize at last.
Only way to fix it permanently I guess is with a noose.

It is not time for that yet,
so I must deal with this pain, I would be lying if I said it is no sweat.

real
loneliness
is not
necessarily
limited
to when
you are
alone