One gonna hold my memory, another gonna close the door              
One gonna leave me restless, another wanting more

Every single bit of drive
The dream that once propelled me forward
Working vigorously, trying to reach it
Thinking I could reach it
Now seems just that. A dream.
And I feel as though I've let down
Every single person I see
And the motivation is all gone,
Because what am I working for?
Please tell me, what am I working for
If he's right, then what am I doing
Shouldn't I give up
Shouldn't I stop
Shouldn't I just fill in the role
Of the dissappoinment
we all knew would happen

If you feel the urge to see me
Well you'd best pretend you're blind
I don't mean to be unkind
But all the reasons I left you behind
They should be clear now

"With all due respect," I continue to say when I know none is deserved.

What have I become afraid of, self consciousness or confidence?
Inability or the risk of flying high?
Losing or winning it all?

I like keeping things in and away
But my eyes don't lie, and people can see

well I wonder on these late nights
if you stay up for no reason like I do
and then find your mind wander to me
and wonder what you are doing

I got asked who I loved today
my response was that I used to love you
but love never fails
well if that's true it's not
cause it was love

I always think about what you could be doing
or think about how it's going
nobody ever tells me the truth about u
only alright and fine
along with "he's hanging in there"

you make it hard cause I don't know if I will be able to fall in love for a year or two
or maybe eternity
but I can't help but compare
but then again I know I deserve better than what u gave me
but because I've only been in love once <with you> and so I don't have anyone else to compare with
but at least I'll know when it comes next that it's love
so I'll thank you
I'll know because what we had was reality

No one contact me by my phone
I won't be going anywhere anytime soon
No contact, nothing
Left to sit in my room and rot
Decay, don't call me, don't text
I am numb, back to numbness
Defense mechanism against
Fear

You're a fool, Jesus Christ.
How can I help you?