I remember telling you
that it will take 21 days
of constant conversations
til you become a part of my routine
til you become a habit

We went beyond the 21 days.
You became a habit
you became a routine.
And it worked.
But only for me.
And not for you.

Now, I keep telling myself
it will only take me 21 days--
to stop longing for your kisses
to stop thinking about your face
to stop romanticizing the time we had
to stop missing you
to break the habit.

I have 19 days left
But ****,
this feels like it will take forever

I feed from the leftovers
I breathe from the exhales
I stay on the undertones
I stand on the peripheries
I linger on the outliers
Of your thoughts
Your words
Your energy
Your soul.
I never get the middle
The center
The core
The wholeness
Of your thoughts
Your words
Your energy
Your soul.