Waiting for...

...Waiting for... if only I could remember...
...the mild, misty memory....
...It is important....
...I think...
...It had to do with ice...
...Clean, crisp, cool ice...
...and a voice...
...distant and shrill...
...like the wind...
...calling to me...
...asking for something...
...desperate for...
...for...
...a question...
...if only I could remember...
...it's vital...
...fatal...
...waiting for...
...the signal...
...the cue...
...waiting for...
...if only I could remember...
...waiting for..............................................................­.................................................................­.................................................................­.................................................................­.............................................

Take a deep breath
and let it all just dissapear
all your worries,
all your fears.
Let them peel off, shed your camelion skin.
And soar
High above the towering tree tops
and the drooping dry dams
and the cold crystal clouds
and the rushing, reeling rivers.
Watch the bubbles disperse
one
by
one
until there are none.

I sit at the table staring into the past.
Each memory warm as ice.
I wonder what you are thinking of.
Is it me?
Do you feel the same way that I do?
Does each moment we spend apart rip at you like a tornado?
Probably not...
Oh well

I hold onto each moment with an iron grip.
I remember the occasional twitch in your eye that accented the golden sparkle.
I remember the way your face would twist and turn as you made strange expressions.
I remember the slight slant of your eyebrows when you were surprised.
I remember the small moles on either side of your finger.
I remember each laugh we shared and each tear we shed together.

Where are you now?
What are you doing?
Are you thinking of me?
Probably not...
Oh well

I cannot stand being without you.
Each time I think of walking those halls without you,
of leaning on lockers without you,
going to classes without you,
getting in trouble without you,
I shudder.
Do you shudder?
Does the mere thought of life without me scare you?
Probably...
Probably...


I just hope that your sadness is not as great as mine.
I just wish that you are at least happy.

Yet I don't want to have to hope and wish...
I want to be with you.

Her finger falls,
crashing like a wrecking ball,
through the desperate blue of Toronto,

pulling a single brown petal,
back splashed by the emerald of her eyes.  

She mutters something I pretend not to hear,
and pours the heavy water over the city.

Then she sits back in her chair, with a knowing smile,
and coughs
into her marigold
tissue.

To express yourself
You don't need to be eloquent
You don't need to have long thoughtless sentences
and riddled paragraphs
all you need is
one pen
and
one paper
and
any words